Immunoglobulins

It’s 5:24 a.m. I’ve been awake a couple hours now. Later on this morning we’re going to Loyola hospital in Maywood. I’m having labs and then getting an immunoglobulin infusion to help boost my immune system. I’ve had bronchial congestion, wheezing and coughing since late September. I’ll do whatever it takes to feel better. Mike has enough on his plate right now without worrying about me. My poor health has been increasingly limiting my activities with family and our community. I’m hoping today’s treatment will help.

I fell asleep early last evening so it’s no surprise I woke up so early. We went to see Mike’s mom yesterday morning. The caregiver, Charity, had bathed her, helped her out of bed into a chair and fed her breakfast. She looked worn out and haggard to me but Mike thought she looked good compared to previous days. Her time on earth is limited. It reminds me of tending my own mother before she died. It’s hard for Michael. We all will pass through the gate at some point. No one escapes it. 

I’ve been getting a lot done at home lately- lots of cabinets and drawers cleaned out. Clutter weighs you down. I feel panicked when I can’t find things. I feel more relaxed and at ease when things are clean and organized. I’m a big fan of feng shui and minimalism.

feng shui

I’m needing to start meditating again. I used to do it regularly in my younger days. There’s more reason to do it now. I have so much more going on now. I need more connections with the universe. 

I’m 64 now!!!!!

Winter cold

I’ve had a bad cold for a couple days and have stayed home. I’m not back to normal yet but am better than yesterday. I slept better. I’m glad it’s about gone. 

Yesterday I had to go to the hospital and get another echocardiogram to compare to the one from September ( right after the heart attack). It had improved significantly. I haven’t heard from the cardiologist yet. I have to get done with this cold and get back to the gym. 

6:56

The Sun is coming up. The quiet pastel display out of the front window is beautiful and awe inspiring. I love my mornings alone to read the newspapers on my iPad and sip my coffee. 

I have to go get dressed and take Bitzi out to pee in a few minutes. Mike is still sleeping. He had a rough day yesterday with his mother’s latest test results. He’s dreading talking to her about it, talking with his siblings about it, talking with his mom and her oncologist tomorrow. It’s a difficult situation. I’ll just try to be as helpful and supportive as I can.

Angels watching over me

It’s morning coffee time. In a few minutes I’ll go get dressed, take the dog out to pee and go to cardiac rehab at the hospital campus. I only have four days this week and I’m done completely on Thursday. Friday I’m subbing after having taken a break since early September. After I get back home from rehab I’m riding along with Michael to go to St.Charles and take his mom to Bloomingdale for her CT scan and brain MRI. The doctor had stopped her chemo weeks ago as her cancer had progressed.  The only option left is stronger chemo and she is already depressed, angry, exhausted and has increasing bouts of memory loss. Mike is her power of attorney and the situation has been really draining on him. He is just recently over Covid and I can tell he’s still very tired from it. So I’m going along to help support them both. I’d better get going. More later.

4:20. We’ve been home for a while and I took Bitzi for a brisk walk around the lagoon just now. We got the results of Mike’s mom’s scans she had this morning. The news isn’t good. The cancer in her lung and brain are growing. Mike and his mom have a phone appointment with her oncologist Wednesday morning to talk about it. Mike has been trying to reach his siblings to talk about this. I feel bad for all of them. I’ve been through it with my mom and myself and is just awful. I can’t even imagine how on earth I’m still alive. I’ve always known there are angels watching over and helping me. No kidding. I just hope there are angels for Annette too. 

I’m reading this book now. It’s pretty good. It actually makes a lot of sense if you can get past the adolescent humor and redundancy. Basically a good read.

After the scans and taking Annette home we stopped at Portillo in Elgin for lunch. I know I sound like some old dried up codger but I cannot believe how expensive everything is now. It’s crazy! I brought most of my Italian beef home. It will be good tomorrow.

Hot chocolate

The dog is crunching and slurping her food in the kitchen that I just gave her. I’m in the living room drinking hot chocolate by mistake. I grabbed the wrong pod. Mike is asleep in our bedroom. Is 6:18. He was feeling worse yesterday. I hope he got some good sleep. I stayed in the living room all night and I was coughing quite a lot. As far as I know I’m still Covid negative. I just normally cough a lot. Yesterday was a very quiet blah day. I’m assuming today will be the same. Mike talked to his mom twice on he phone yesterday. She’s getting worse with her dementia and moods and memory. She admitted to Mike that she stopped taking her antidepressants months ago ( no surprise). 

Winding down

I know humans catch colds and viruses. I know some of us are more prone to catch stuff. I know that this too shall pass. I’m just feeling very aggravated with this recent stuff I’ve picked up. Fortunately it’s only some runny nose and annoying tickle-y cough but I’ve tried SO hard to not catch anything. Suck it up buttercup. Pull up your big girl pants and get over it. It could be worse. Yuckkkkkk.

In a little while I have to wake up the 3 boys and get their stuff packed up and loaded and drive them to Lacon to meet my daughter. Arlo (5) has been pretty exhausting. He’s a super picky eater and sometimes he can be a rude whine-y little tyrant. Mike and I have both had to take him aside and talk to him. He’s got 2 rowdy older brothers and a baby sister to compete with. I get it but he still can’t be a rude tyrant. Sometimes he can be super sweet. He’s absolutely adorable so that helps save him. Anyway after four days grandma and grandpa are ready for a rest. We had 8 year old Hennessy here for a week before the boys too. Happy new year. I hope my cough stops soon. I’ll be wearing my mask today when I go out.