Friday, April 12


I woke up wheezing, struggling to breathe with my nose running. I got up, went in to my bathroom, coughed up a bunch, blew my nose and came back to bed to try to go back to sleep without waking Michael. Unfortunately I continued to wheeze and kept having the gooey throat-tickling sinus cough, turning side to side and I could hear the morning birds starting to sing and see the slight glow of dawn through the window shade side cracks.  I just got up, took out my retainers, coughed up more phlegm, used my inhaler, used my Astapro nose spray and came out to the kitchen and made two small strong pods of coffee with sugar-free coconut macaroon flavoring syrup and milk. I  opened a few of the window blinds and now I sit on the living room couch with my cozy old ratty sweater over my pajamas with a blanket and the dog on my lap, blissful in the morning serenity. I love the sound of morning birds.

So yesterday my “ ship” came in. After nine years of waiting, going through all the back and forth legal processes, the Zoom hearing, thinking it was dead in the water or a scam countless times and that nothing would ever come of it, now I actually have received it. Since I found out yesterday afternoon I’ve felt stunned and bewildered. It simply doesn’t seem real. I feel strangely fearful although I know I shouldn’t be. I still sort of feel like crying. Beyond what I’ve said it’s hard to explain. It’s just a really strange feeling. 


The past couple days I’ve been rewatching The Tudors on Amazon Prime on my IPad with headphones while Mike has been watching The Masters. I love all the historical shows, the sets, costuming, makeup, etc…I really especially like the history of the Tudor lineage and all the quirks and misdeeds of their descendants. I guess my English/Scottish ancestry makes me more interested in that topic. 

I have a bunch of vegetable seeds started in containers on my rolling metal shelf by the patio doors in the kitchen. Every day lately I check, water, mist and rotate them. I love tending and growing plants. With our modest house and small yard everything has to be on a small compact scale of course. I have a whole bag full of flower seed packets waiting to be planted when the danger of frost is over in a few weeks. 

7:20 Mike is still sleeping. I fed the dog, tidied up the kitchen, made me a third cup of coffee, ate some cheerios, took my pills and ordered more vegetable seeds. The sun is shining. Shortly I’ll get dressed and take Bitzi out for her morning walk. The law firm is supposed to call me this morning as I had questions about the second docu-sign email yesterday as Wednesday’s said it was the “final” one but then I got another yesterday. WTF? After that call THEN we’re going to the bank to make sure everything is kosher.

Thursday, April 11

Plot Twist

Now that we’re retired the days of the week seem more fluid and undefined. It’s a “ every day is Sunday” kind of feel. Mostly it’s nice but at times it’s a bit weird and surreal. This is now my fourth year of being retired. Only lately have I not felt like I needed to substitute teach and sign up for all sorts of groups and clubs to fill my time. The past few months I’ve been slowly backing out of those things. I no longer want to “ have to do” anything. After four years I am no longer going to be a neighborhood rep. I have put in way too much time, effort, angst and my own money for very little appreciation and no monetary compensation. I’ve had my turn and somebody else can do it. Of course, no one else has expressed ANY interest in doing it and taking over my position. Of course, the other 550 resident neighbors want someone else to plan and set up all the events for them and then complain, criticize and talk behind your back. What a great job for NO pay! So my goal moving forward is to be truly retired and have no dreary commitments that I have to do. I’ve put in my time.

We are supposed to leave for a Bahamas cruise in less than 2 weeks. I had to get medicine for my sinus and bronchial infection 3 days ago. My lower back has been hurting the last few days but I am determined to be feeling much better for our trip. Next week I’m driving down to see my sisters and kids. The week after that I have  a bunch of neighborhood events to do and then it will be go time. 

After 9 years of an issue dragging on, it appears my “ship is coming in” very shortly. It doesn’t seem real. I’ll believe it when it actually hits.

Sunday, April 7

Lawn mower

I’m drinking my coffee with a pump of sugar-free vanilla and a pump of hazelnut plus a splash of 2% milk. Since I bought my pump bottles of flavored syrups I’d gotten used to sweetened coffee. I used to always take it just with milk.

Our furnace is still working okay but about a week ago it started making a new sound that is like someone is mowing outside. Mike called and talked to the furnace guy about it. It’s just mildly weird and annoying.

Today I’m going to the movie theater to watch the 85th anniversary special screening of Gone With The Wind. I’m going alone which is fine. Actually I enjoy it. No chatting or accommodating anyone else, just relaxing indulgent me time. 

The NCAA women’s basketball final game is this afternoon. Mike is recording it so we can watch it together when I get home from the movie. I’ve been watching the last few games and cheering on Iowa. It should be a really exciting game! 

Wednesday, April 3

Winter Wonderland

It’s snowing hard and then melting. If it was Christmas Day it would be great but today it’s just aggravating. Ah, such is Illinois in early spring.

I’ve been mildly blah the last several days. My sinus/ bronchial congestion are improving from last week but still a troublesome nuisance to live with. Yesterday I took Bitzi for a long walk on the park wilderness trail in the rain. It wasn’t too bad. I was pretty sick for a couple days Friday and Saturday with some gut bug on top of my congestion. It took a lot out of me but my strength is returning. (It’s always something.) Yesterday I tried on a bunch of clothes, trying to decide what to take on our cruise in a month. I need to pack a few basic lightweight neutral items to mix and match. I don’t want to take too much. They have to be light, comfy, versatile and quick drying. The Bahamas will be a much- needed escape. 

Saturday, March 23


I haven’t posted for a while. I got rid of my old posts.

I was up most of the night with an upset stomach. I think it was food poisoning. The friend I had lunch with also got sick in the night.