Stay young!

Showing posts with label #quarantine. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #quarantine. Show all posts

Friday, December 11

Merrily down the stream....

Good morning. And I’m using my headset microphone and dictation and trying to get used to it. The sun has not come up yet. I’m simmering cloves,lemon slices and cinnamon sticks in a little pan on the stove. The aroma is scenting  the house in a wonderful way that smells like Christmas. I love doing that in December. It makes me happy. I still feel a little sad that the kids are grown but now we have the grandkids. Due to the pandemic we don’t see them much. My sense of taste and smell never fully returned after the stem cell transplant. There was some wicked chemo that was used to penetrate the blood- brain barrier. It took me about seven months after that to be able to taste or smell anything at all and even now five years later I’m still not normal. I can smell the simmering Christmas concoction a bit. I can sometimes smell my own armpits. Some perfumes I’m unable to smell nor natural gas from the stove. It is what it is. I’ve stopped dictating. It seems weird to be speaking out loud while I’m sitting here alone. To me it’s somewhat cathartic to type. 

This is Friday and the students I’m subbing for are asynchronous. I have put activities in their online folders. It just seems weird. So I have three more weeks of this gig- two after Christmas break and the last week of it, on Jan.11 is supposed to be in person with kids. I’m a bit ambivalent but keeping an open mind. It would only be five days. 


The sun is coming up now. I just went out to the kitchen and made another cup of coffee and opened the blinds on the back windows and sliding glass doors and Bitzi didn’t wake up or come out of her igloo so I just let her sleep. On days when I’ve been starting work online at eight I take her out for her first walk at seven but today she can sleep. Mike still takes her out to pee in the middle of the night but she surely doesn’t need it. She usually just wanders back in to her igloo by nine every night and puts herself to bed. She’s very well tempered and behaved.

After this sub job is done I’m not sure if I want to take more especially as schools are talking about returning students before the pandemic is over and vaccines have been given widely. Maybe my immune system is strong enough now but I still don’t produce immunoglobulins like normal humans so it’s a bit tricky....




Saturday, December 5

Know thyself



It’s 8:41am Saturday morning. It’s bright and nippy outside. I took Bitzi for a walk around Wildflower Lake earlier. There was frost on the ground and ice on the water. We’ll go for another walk later. Today I’m going to devote several hours creating sub plans and practicing with the new technology so I don’t feel frustrated and panicked like I did Wednesday and Thursday. I want to put my full attention to the kids and teaching and not worry about all the other shit. Before long this temporary job will be done. I’ve lost eighteen pounds since October 21 when I started keto and fasting. I’ve had a few blips on the radar when I’ve had too many carbs but overall I’m good. This is a lifestyle change. I’m walking more. My gut and my breathing are much improved. I’m no longer having knee and back pain. It’s going well. I’ve made out a schedule for myself today so I’m going to go get to work. I have a tendency to procrastinate and put off doing things.....I always feel so much better after I get my stuff done ( aka know yourself.)I believe Mike has some work to do today



I am feeling very happy and blessed today. The sun shining helps greatly. I can’t believe how far my health has come since the return of my brain cancer and stem cell transplant in spring of 2015. I thank God for my blessings every day ( even though I complain and gripe some times, know I have won the ultimate lotto of life!)

2:38pm. I’ve gotten a whole bunch of school stuff done today and taken two long walks with the dog. I’m not 100% finished yet but I’ve made really good progress. Tomorrow I’ll be testing my media and setting my timing and plans. 


Thursday, November 12

Returning to lock down

1:33pm Thursday

Sitting here in my chair in the front sitting room typing with my right index finger. The dishwasher is whooshing softly in the kitchen. After lunch I gave Bitzi a bath in the utility sink, toweled her off and let her run around. Then she rang her bells hanging from the back door so I took her out for a little walk across the street. She did her duty and dried off a little more then we came back. She’s still damp and napping on the rug by the back door in the sun. Mike is sealed off back in his office. I took Bitzi for two other walks this morning and had an 11:00 Zoom interview for a long term music sub job in D300. I thought it went well but I’m not sure I’d want it if they offer it. We’ll see. I interviewed with a principal, asst.principle and head of the district fine arts and none of them knew what the pay rate would be and said I’d need to speak with HR if an offer was submitted. Whatever.....  I’m not in the mood to chase anything these days. 
Lots of things are closing down, canceling or rolling backwards now with the second surge of the virus. Lots of people I know have had it or had to quarantine due to exposure. Pretty scary. Things are messed up and shitty. I’m tired of trying to make lemonade with these shitty lemons. 

I have a 4:00 Zoom meeting with Lola. There’s some drama going on between her and her mom and I want to try to help any way I can. 



Wednesday, October 14

Remodeling angst

7:44am I have to take Bitzi over to the vet in a few minutes to get her leptospirosis vaccine. I have some stuff to get done around here later. Our house is all piled up with stuff out of the rooms and closets we’re having painted and worked on. The remodeling hell has officially begun. It will be worth it in the long run. 

1:06pm
I have brownies baking and I’m sitting at the kitchen table with my iPad and keyboard directly across from my husband doing work on his MacBook Pro. The workmen are hear painting the office, laundry room and closet, spare bedroom and closet. They’ve painted all the ceilings first. There are drop cloths  and paint cans and supplies all over. Combine that with our junk piled around (from the rooms being worked on) and it makes for a very hectic environment. 
It’s chilly and very windy outside. I’ve been for two walks with Bitzi. I’m feeling very good lately aside from the bug bites I got last week and my occasional left knee pain. I think I aggravated my knee by walking around a bunch in flip flops at the beginning of summer. I believe that’s what started it. I has felt much better since I got the Dr Scholl’s inserts designed for knee pain and put them in my Skechers. Mike thinks I need walking shoes with a thicker sole and better support. I hate heave clunky shoes though. I like my Skechers because they’re so light and flexible. Anyway I’m feeling good, exercising and sleeping well. 
Next Tuesday I got to Loyola for my check up with Dr. Stiff my oncologist who did my stem cell transplant. It will be five years on November 23. 
The brownies are out of the oven. I’m letting them cool before they’re frosted. They’re made with duck eggs Sallie gave me. I’m not telling the guys......


The brownies are a hit!  Really good.

The wind is super strong and nasty outside. After her lepto vaccine, Bitzi is pretty slow and lethargic. She’s walking like she’s a bit sore. They gave her a steroid pain killer and Benadryl. Poor little fluffkin.  

I’m reading Lee Smith’s Oral History again for the third time but I haven’t read it in a long time now. I love to reread and rewatch my old favorites. That’s just the way I am. 

4:37 after much research and thinking and pricing and investigating I decided not to buy a new laptop and I just bought a new nice higher quality keyboard for my existing iPad. I think it will suffice for my needs. Actually it isn’t even a new nicer keyboard it’s a refurbished nicer higher quality keyboard at half the price of new. I’m using now and it’s like driving a Cadillac compared to my old broken down jalopy keyboard. SO smooth......and nice and it actually FITS my IPad instead of slipping and being stuck on there with nano tape. So I’m happy for now. I feel fancy. I’m happy. The guys are still here painting and Mike is on a work call across the table from me. After while we’re going to the countertop place to finalize our selection and put down half on the quartz so they can come out and laser measure to cut the stone. I‘M SO excited!!!!!!

Wednesday, September 16

Mittwoch

8:34am I have a 9-12 Zoom new employee orientation meeting to allow me the option to sub in the school district I just retired from. ( Silly) but since it was more than 30 days after I retired when I inquired about subbing I have to jump through a bunch of stupid hoops. 

Yesterday we met with a financial consultant about rolling my two 403Bs and my pension lump sum into a single aggressive IRA. I feel better now. It’s gonna be okay.

Saturday, September 12

How to not get depressed during the pandemic

Every day when I get up I have to mentally slap myself and not sink into gloom and depression. Every morning I still have to remind myself I’m still alive and have much to be grateful for. I have to constantly nudge myself away from sliding into worry and dread and dark thoughts. I’m a person who expects the worst doom to happen and then I prepare so I’m ready. In my life I’ve been through some pretty awful dark horrible flaming shit and I never want to go back there but it’s always possible. You always have to keep your antennas up to watch out for monsters and you have to make yourself intentionally think GOOD thoughts all day every day. Plus my batshit crazy head always has this inner snarky,cynical, sarcastic,  bitchy voice commenting about everything and I’m always trying to tamp her down and remain outwardly pleasant and polite. If you think good thoughts, good things will come to you. If you show kindness to others, kindness will be shown to you. If you are generous to others, you will receive generosity. Life is an echo. It’s the law of attraction. You will attract the energy you radiate. 

It’s been gloomy and raining for days now. We’re going over to my stepson and daughter-in-laws for their baby gender reveal party ( that’s “a thing” now with millennials.....) and I’m uncomfortable about going. Due to a sonogram Thursday the doctor identified a mass in the embryo’s chest and is pretty sure it’s some congenital defect called C-PAM. So they’re going to wait to see if it resolves on it’s own or the baby may need surgery immediately upon birth. I can’t imagine why they’re going ahead with the party. I feel so bad for them and don’t know what to say. Plus my husbands ex will be there and she is always loud obnoxious and attention getting. I always feel very strained being around her. I’ve got to just relax, take a deep breath and pull up my big girl panties and slap  on a friendly, happy face. I know I had one here somewhere.....

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