Just keep swimming

11:15 I went over to the lodge for my scheduled indoor pool time and just as I scanned my ID card and entered the fire alarm went off and everyone evacuated the building. I stood outside for a while. Police and fire responders came. I saw nor smelled any smoke so eventually I just got in my car and came home. Since the one- hour pool times and cleanings in between are scheduled all day my time was used up a lot so I just gave up. I’m still a bit tired from yesterday anyway.  I have a phone interview later for a neurologist’s receptionist position. Sounds like it might be a good deal. As long as Mike is still working I might as well work too. We don’t know when the axe will fall on him. 1:57. I thought the interview went well and I’m excited about it. There are other candidates being interviewed though. I know the neurologist. This is a good company to work for. I am hopeful. Mike has been worried about TRS screwing up my retirement stuff. All these years I have covered him with my scho

I haven’t really posted or written much in a while. I want to say there’s been too much going on but I’m not sure that is quite accurate. I haven’t been sure what to say. Through this whole pandemic clusterf*ck I feel like I’ve been under water holding my breath waiting for it to be over so I could come to the surface sunlight and all would be well. The boogie man would be gone. Donald Trump would be gone. The corona virus would be gone. The political unrest would be gone. Cancer would be gone. But no.  Here I am and the shit’s still the same. You can’t be too tired. You can’t deny it or ignore it. You can assume somebody else is going to fix it. You have to take a deep breath, pull up yer britches and keep trudging on through the everyday muck and bile of living in this world. You have to pause and revel in the few and far between sweet spots but don’t ever let yourself expect the sweet spots or take them for granted. Oh no. Because karma is always watching your ungrateful ass and wil

So I’m feeling pretty heart sick and angst filled. My oldest daughter hasn’t been talking to any of us since Christmas. It seemed like one day things were okay and the next day she completely cut everybody off so finally yesterday I kept texting her and calling her and texted her husband. Later in the afternoon she sent me an angry hateful cussing rant text. She has gone completely off her rocker. I’ve also been worried for her two young daughters. She evidently has started on some new strong dose of Cymbalta for her fibromyalgia and is trying to cut out all stress and anxiety but it’s obviously making her a crazy bitch. I’ve read up on it and adverse side effects can be anger, hostility, aggression and increased depression.  I’m just going to leave her alone and not contact her anymore. I will never forgive her for what she said. Karma is a bitch. She’ll wake up and realize at some point but I’m done and I’m really hurting. She’s thirty seven and I have to trust things will eventually