Hennessy just went to bed. Milo and Lola are in my bedroom watching TV. Mike is sitting on the living room couch watching TV. I’m sitting in the adjacent front room in my recliner. It’s been a long day. The kids and the dog and I went on many walks today. Overall it was a good day.
Saturday, August 1
Friday, June 12
Mike is getting ready to leave for physical therapy. He'll be back in a half hour. The office is close and their exercise routine is quick.
I'm having to check and remind myself what day it is nearly every day now with neither of us @ going" to work. Mike is still working but he's here at home. It still seems strange after three months of it.
I just gave the puppy a good scrubbing bath in the utility sink in the laundry room. I havent given her a bath all week since the girls have been here. Mike is going to take care of her this weekend when I leave tomorrow to take the girls home to Norris and then go to Lewistown to get the boys and bring them back home for next week. It was a bit too wearing for me last weekend trying to manage the puppy while away. Since then she has stopped going to the back door to ring the bells when she needs to go out.
The landscapers are here. I just went out there and gave Rene his payment for May and checked to make sure they'll trim the bushes in front of the house that have grown up taller than the windows. The tree service is coming in a week or two when the get caught up to remove a couple big overgrown bushes and a tree or two. There are a lot of things that haven't been touched in twenty years since this house was built. The trees and those monster lilacs have never been trimmed. The roof needs replaced and we're waiting on insurance to approve it. It's sustained storm damage several times and needs replaced.
I just got back from the community garden for the second time today. I bought two jalapeño plants at Walmart earlier today so went back out to the garden. My sweet corn is coming up. I have four tomato plants, 6 yellow squash plants, radishes, sweet corn and now the peppers.
Lola doesn't have a headache today but has mostly been camped in the recliner in my bedroom watching TV and eating junk all day. Hennessy went to the garden with me both times. I guess Lola is being a teenager. I took the girls to the Rookies restaurant here in town for lunch. They had outside dining on patio tables with umbrellas. Of course there was WAY too much food. Hennessy just nibbles a little bit frequently like a mouse. Lola just wants expensive sweet Starbucks stuff most of the time. I'll leave here around 10-11 tomorrow to take them home. It bugs me my car is dirty but realistically it won't do me any good to clean it until I take the boys home next week because it's just going to get messy again with them. I'm tired.
In trimming the front bushes this morning the landscapers chopped off my foxglove that's was getting ready to bloom!!! I said a lot of bad words when I discovered that. I knew I should have cut the bushes myself. Mike insisted on having the landscapers do it. Damn it!
Thursday, June 11
I'm making chicken and dumplings. The broth with the chicken and vegetables is boiling. The dumpling dough is mixed up in a bowl and waiting to go into the hot liquid. I haven't made dumplings from scratch in a long time. I usually just use Bisquick for quick and easy dumplings so we'll see how these turn out. I've been trying to cook smaller amounts of things the last few months.
I'm kind of tired from taking the dog out and pulling / digging weeds. I drove the girls and the puppy to St.Charles this morning to visit Annette, Mike's mom. She was delighted to see us. She's doing surprisingly well considering her lung cancer immune therapy treatments. She's 81 but looks to be in her early 70s.
3:52 Lola has a headache and feels fishy. She was in the sun at Annette's and then got some coffee chocolate Oreo cookie shake at Starbucks with the $10 that Annette gave her then heated up a bunch of chicken fried rice when we got home. She's in my bedroom in the recliner with the lights off and the shades drawn. I gave her Excedrins and took her temp ( normal) . She can lay in there in the dark watching TV and hopefully she'll feel better after while. Hennessy is in the living room near me in the sitting room zoned out to SpongeBob Squarepants. The utsnerap myn osrewlof tp is sleeping in her cage.
When I was down in Lewistown last week I went to the Walmart in Canton with the boys and got a few things including a bunch of red, white and blue artificial flowers. We drove out to the country to the Bethel Cemetery south of Canton way out in the boonies where the old strip mines used to be. I put flowers on my parents', younger sister's and uncle's graves and pulled weeds from around the headstones and talked to my parents quickly and quietly after I sent the boys back to the car. I talk to them a couple times a year when I'm able. It's for me. It makes me feel better. It holds me over for a couple months until I can get back there.
I hate missing people I love and not being able to talk to them.
6:04 The dumplings turned out good. I'm happy. Hennessy, six, is a very picky eater and mostly just wants to eats sweets. I don't argue or force them to eat anything but she won't be getting ice cream later. The dog is sleeping in her crate. I'm going out to my garden plot early in the morning and not tonight. I'm too tired. If I was here alone I'd probably take a nice hot bath and lay down and cry. There are too many things going on that worry me. At some point I'm going to need to let it go and cry. I rarely ever allow myself to cry anymore. Crying is like a release and washing of the heart.
Mikes shoulders are getting better. He's starting to be able to reach back again. Baby steps.
The girls are quiet now for the time being. I wish I could just take a big sponge and wash everything down so the world would be okay.
My roses, lilies and other flowers are blooming.
Tuesday, March 10
Now that we’ve changed the clocks back to daylight savings time it’s dark in the morning when I get up. Yesterday was a very difficult drive to work in the dark with the rain and headlight glare on the wet pavement. I missed the exit to I-90 so went straight on 47 to 20 East which took much longer. Then I took 20 to 25 south to Bartlett to my school. Very tense drive. Today I don’t have to leave as early and it’s not raining.
I feel like I have this giant weight on me because of Annette’s cancer and because of my daughter cutting us off for 3 months now. No clue, no argument, no conflict. She just stopped talking and communicating around Christmas #familymatters, #familyissues, #cancerfight,#curecancer.
Today after school we have 6th grade band rehearsal ( concert in one week) and then a 90- minute secondary music staff meeting. I know I’ll be dragging.
My stepson Casey’s new bulldog Eisenhower
My zinnias are growing
Wednesday, February 12
I need to get my gluteus maximus out of the recliner and start getting my hot mess self ready to go to school. It’s supposed to snow again this afternoon. My throat is still sore and hoarse ( third day). Last night I put Vic’s vaporub on my throat with a towel. I’ll gargle with warm salt water before I leave.
I still feel very low and glum with thoughts of my daughter’s bullshit and Annettes biopsy results. It’s like someone dropped a load of bricks on me. I kept tearing up last night thinking about Mike and his siblings going over to Annette’s this morning to tell her about her biopsy results. It’s got to be difficult. Mike is pretty tough. He just comes out and says things and tells the truth no matter what.
Okay getting up and getting ready for work. I’ll probably add more later. I will need to vent to you. I am not one who can hold things inside.
11:43 I have a pretty generous time gap between schools on Wednesday. I finished up at my first school and then went to the gas station and filled up. Now I'm killing time before I go in to my next school. I've caught up with emails. I texted Mike and he said his mother took the cancer new surprisingly well. It will probably take a while to sink in. I think they're trying to her scheduled with an oncologist appointment now. I tried calling my daughter again and left a message.
It's getting colder now and getting ready to start snowing.
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