Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 9

Trump’s second impeachment trial and the constitution

I think Trump’s hateful ranting speech on January 6 did motivate the rioters to storm the Capitol and commit heinous acts of violence. He was encouraging his cult to overthrow the election. I think this speech should not be protected under first amendment rights as his lawyers are claiming in his defense. Also he did it while he was still president. I say prosecute him to the fullest extent. His whole cult needs to be over. Cut the monster’s head off. 

I watch CNN Anderson Cooper 360 almost every day and Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday and ShowTimes The Circus on Sunday nights. I guess the political stuff is like sports to me. Mike watches them too  and usually knows more details than me. There has been so much awful, unbelievably crazy stuff going on the last several years. 

Last week on Wednesday Northwestern Medicine started giving vaccines to Sun City residents 75 and up here at our main lodge. We have over 10,000 residents in our community so the last several days the lodge parking lot has been full and there’s a steady stream of seniors coming and going from the lodge. It’s going quickly and smoothly. I take Bitzi over there to walk her on the nicely cleared sidewalks so I see all the people going in for their vaccines. It makes me happy and hopeful to see it and I know I’m witnessing history. I’m happy to go get my first vaccine dose this morning. Hopefully phase 1C will start soon and Mike will get his. 

I woke up at 3am and couldn’t go back to sleep. It’s 4:59 now. I’m drinking coffee and had part of an almond poppy seed muffin. I woke up at three thinking I shouldn’t work subbing until at least the end of March when both vaccines will be in and taking full effect. I’ve been considering going back in a couple weeks after the first vaccine but my subconscious decided for me this morning. I don’t need the money. I have a pension and a lot of money in the bank. I need to be healthy and happy. I’ll stay busy with other things. 

Sunday, September 20

What’s it all about?


I’ve gone for two big walks today. It’s sunny, fresh and brisk. We’re going over to visit Annette and  may leave Bitzi to stay with her for a day or two. She’s been pretty depressed lately and missing her little dog that died. Mike and his siblings need to get their mom another dog. 

Later, in the evening
The visit to Annette’s was cut short and we left abruptly. Under normal circumstances she’s a very nit picky fussy bossy person. She just is and I can only take so much. Today she started getting nasty, defensive and insulting so Mike just stood up and said we were leaving. I’m wondering if she’s developing Alzheimer’s......We’re not helping her get another dog, evidently that’s already covered. We had talked about taking her to northern Wisconsin for a few days to visit relatives. On the way home yesterday I told Mike that’s too long of a ride up there trapped in the car with her and I’m not going. I can only be so nice for so long. She’s not my mother. My mother is long dead. 

Friday, September 18

Take it to the limit

I’ve made it to Friday without too much trouble. It’s noticeably chilly today and there’s a frost warning for tonight. I sprayed all my potted plants outside that I want to bring inside and washed off all my little folding patio tables with the hose and all the plant bottom trays and let them dry and then I brought them all inside. Two were beastly heavy. I set the tables up by my bedroom windows and put most of the plants in there. The biggest crazy heavy tree is still sitting in the kitchen by the sliding door. At least I got it in the door and on a rug so it’s slightly easier to move.i was puffing and panting so badly after that. Earlier this morning I took Bitzi on a nice long brisk walk. 

I just drug the big heavy tree pot into the living room by the window. I’m exhausted and panting like I just gave birth. 

Monday, August 24

Adrift in the ocean

It’s Monday morning. It’s still odd to me how time now seems like a blur with the pandemic, so many working from home, my retirement, listening to the Covid-19 reports every day. Just a really weird period we’re going through. This is the first day of online back to school classes for my former school district. It’s an odd feeling but I have no regrets. 

I have a 2:15 indoor pool slot scheduled to go exercise. Yesterday I went for a couple walks and planted two rose bushes. I’m doing laundry right now. I’ve taken Bitzi outside walking around the yard twice this morning. She is too distracted staring at things, sniffing and trying to chew sticks and leaves.

We went to the wedding Friday night. There was a huge tent in their big back yard with tables for fifty people, a makeshift alter and a dance floor. The flower arrangements were beautiful. The catered food and service were excellent.

Saturday we took my mother-in-laws tiny yorkie to the vet to put her down. She had kidney failure and bone loss and couldn’t eat. It was sad but it was time. 

I’ve been rewatching The Handmaid’s Tale on Hulu this past week.

I need to go to the store this morning and transplant some more plants.

Friday, August 21


I’m typing with one finger on my iPad in the still of the early morning. I can hear Michael’s faint rumble snore from the bedroom behind the sound of the ticking wall clock. I had a pretty good sleep although I woke up a couple times itching. I think a mosquito must have gotten in. They always find me.

I have an indoor pool one- hour time slot reservation this morning. The schedule five time slots each week day allowing twelve people total. There are also four two-hour times you can swim at the outdoor pool. You don’t need an appointment and just show up but they only allow fifty so it’s a first come basis. I’ve been there twice now. Most of the people are there just to stand ( or float on pool noodles) and chit chat. At the indoor pool everyone is exercising or swimming laps. I took my foam barbells and did my exercises at the outdoor pool the other day but everyone else was just standing around. I just did my exercises for an hour and left. I was worn out.

Tonight is the wedding in Elburn. I’m looking forward to it. There are only going to be around fifty people there. It’s probably going to be kind of strange with people in masks but oh well. I’m wearing a new royal blue wrap dress and haven’t even tried it on yet. I hope it looks good.

Mike at Rush hospital 11 years ago when I was very bad and near death.

Lola a few years ago learning to shoot her bow.

I know the pandemic is going on but I keep daydreaming about getting away somewhere- the Florida Keys, a cruise, Gatlinburg, The Mirage in Las Vegas......I just want to get away. Mike is too wary of one of us contracting the virus . The damned virus.

9:15 Mike is in a Zoom meeting in his office. I cleaned up the kitchen and scrubbed the crusted baked beans dish with an SOS pad and got it clean finally ( it soaked overnight) and I loaded the dishwasher, wiped the counters off, took out the trash and recycling and cooked the two remaining ears of sweet corn in the microwave so I can keep them in a ziplock bag in the fridge. Mike loved the ribs I made yesterday. I let them char on the grill then wrapped them in foil and cooked them slow in the oven for several hours sealed in foil. Mine was a bit too salty for me. I think the rub plus the barbecue sauce equaled too much salt but he loved them. I haven’t made ribs in a couple years. 

Thursday, August 20

How do you keep going?

We are all just on our path of life. There will be obstacles along the way. Some of many, many big obstacles. Some have them more frequently than others. You can’t get too set on your path at a certain pace or intensity because sure enough something will come along and you’re going to have to jump, dodge, weave, duck down or stop for a while until it passes. That’s how life is. The better you get used to that the better able you’ll be. Some are really good at anticipating obstacles before they occur. That is ideal.But they are going to come, often at the most unexpected times.

I feel like I’m currently in a pretty good place on my path. I’ve been through many major shit storms though and I never forget it. I’m always on the lookout for the next tiger or monster or tidal wave or shit storm. Just figure they’re going to come. Try to put on the best helmet you can and hunker down. Walk cautiously but joyfully along your path. Oh and try not to be oblivious and fall down any holes or trip over a thorny log either.

Mike just left to play golf. I need to get a wedding card and some coleslaw today. I bought some babyback ribs and put rub on them last night and they’ve been marinating. I’m going to char them on the grill and then shove them in the oven to cook low and slow to tenderize them. I’m hoping they turn out good. I don’t have much experience in cooking ribs. We both like a more vinegar-y sauce. Mike’s favorite is Open Pit.

This morning I took Bitzi out for her walk and then I watered all my flowers outside and my new plantings from yesterday. I ordered two double knockout pink rose bushes so they’ll go in front as well. My goal is for the front flowerbed to eventually be gorgeous.

Arlo, my three year old grandson started preschool on Monday in the same school building where his older brothers go but after a couple days of his crying and screaming my daughter Sarah decided to just give up and wait until next fall. It’s normal for a kid his age. He’s really still in the terrible 2’s. He is pretty clingy to his mama and I can see her wanting for him to go for a couple hours and play with other kids and get used to it. But it was not meant to be. Usually Arlo wants to be like his older brothers and tries to be a big boy but not in this situation.

I have a bunch of aloe Vera plants on the back patio but they had been too near other plants that I needed to water so evidently they have been getting too much water or mist and looked pretty sickly and brown so I moved them to a couple small tables in full sun a couple days ago and already they’re starting to turn more green and plump up. I just hate when I kill a plant. They’re like my babies. I should repot one or two today.

In the past couple years I’ve gotten a lot more freckle-y on my arms and legs for some reason. I’m not thrilled but it is what it is. 

I’d better take Bitzi outside again and get on with my day.

More later. 

Thursday, August 6

Another early waking

5:44 another early day. I’ve, again, been awake for some time and just decided to get up. I’ve had a very faint mild tickle cough the past few days and feel slightly congested in my upper bronchial area and I’m wheezing softly a bit and squeaking in my exhale. I’m sure it’s the weather and pollen. I’ve been so clear for months, thankfully.
Since I got the missed call and voicemail from the derm’s office last night I’ve had all these thoughts and fears going through my head, mostly from memories of watching my mother die a slow agonizing death from melanoma. I can’t ever forget that. The last full body skin scan I had was five years ago after Mike had his skin cancer diagnosed and then removed and the plastic surgery on his face. He’s been okay ever since and just went for another skin scan last month that was fine which reminded me I needed to get one. Since my previous scan I went to the Bahamas and Hawaii and have been working outside a lot more. I always wear a hat and sunglasses but frequently go sleeveless with a scoop neck top and shorts. Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re still not out to get you. 

Everyone’s still asleep. I’m sitting on the far end of the living room on the loveseat by the back window. Lola is sleeping on the sofa bed in the adjacent front sitting room behind an antique six-panel
Oriental screen room divider I had folded up in the closet. Our former neighbor Bob ( deceased about ten years now) gave it to us. He had a couple of them in his basement. It’s very pretty and lavishly embroidered on each panel. It’s handy creating a little sleeping area for Lola. The boys are camped out in the second bedroom. Our master bedroom closet is HUGE so Hennessy’s made that into her private little bedroom with pads, quilts and pillows. MUCH better than the first couple nights with the three kids all in that small bedroom. We leave the closer door cracked open for Hennessy and a nightlight just outside the door.
My sister Sallie texted me yesterday that our handicapped sister Vicki, now at her group home and out of the hospital again for the third time in a month was again spitting up and gagging. They were  putting her on bland liquids but didn’t take her back to the hospital. They’ve run all sorts of tests on her at OSF hospital in Peoria. I wonder if she’s developed some new food allergy or something. Since she’s mentally like a 2-3 year old she can’t tell you a lot of specifics on how she’s feeling. She’ll be 70 years old in a couple weeks.

I can hear Lola rustling around on the sofa bed. I’m trying to be quiet over hear. The window over there by her faces East and only has a cream-colored shade on it so the sunrise is filtering in. 

With this whole pandemic / quarantine/ retiring thing I feel disoriented frequently on what day it is or even what month it is. It doesn’t seem like August but I don’t really know what it seems like. Mike & my twenty-first anniversary is tomorrow. He has to work of course. We may do something special next week when the kids aren’t here. I’m going  to make fish & shrimp tacos and an orange jello cake. I haven’t gotten him anything ( he hates gifts) or gotten or even made a card. Once this pandemic is over and we feel safe we’ll take a good vacation. Maybe another cruise on Pride of America the goes to several Hawaiian islands. When we went in 2018 we couldn’t go to the big island because the volcano was erupting. I’d really like to go to the big island to Hilo and Kona and volcano national park and some orchid farms. Some day....

3:45pm. Sallie texted me this morning. Vicki is worse with abdominal pains, weakness, lethargy, barely talking. She’s seeing a new gastroenterologist in the morning. This is bullshit that she’s been in the hospital three times in the last month, had all kinds of tests run and still no better. I’m taking the kids home to Canton tomorrow and will go see Vicki if possible. 

This morning I took the kids to the park and the boys caught a bunch of fish again. When we came back home after a little while the boys and Lola got in to a fight and were slamming doors. I went to break it up and Milo mouthed off to me in a disrespectful way so I had a come to Jesus meeting with him. Then I told Mike and Mike took him in to his office and talked to him for a long time. Milo came out and apologized and hugged me and started crying. He knows how to be polite he’s just been forgetting lately.....
I’m tired.

Tuesday, June 30

Goodbye, June

I’ve been up since around 2am. For some reason I woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep. I’m sure I’ll hate myself later and need a nap. I’m in a weird frame of mind lately. There’s so much going on and so much to process. Things are starting to open up now and we need to still remain careful and safe. The virus isn’t over yet but a lot of people are acting like it’s gone. 
Mike got up to go to the bathroom a couple hours ago and was stunned to see me out here drinking coffee before sunrise. He’s back in bed asleep now. I fell asleep on the couch pretty early last night and stumbled to bed around nine. 

I hear a train whistle in the distance and birds singing in back of our yard through the screen door. It rained and stormed quite a bit last night. The grass is pretty wet this morning. I’m having my third cup of coffee. Lately I’ve only been having one or two. The puppy is sitting on my lap and her stomach keeps making squishy gurgling noises. I sure hope she doesn’t have an upset stomach. She never seems to want to eat in the morning and feeds later in the day. 

I’ve been kind of looking for a new job but kind of not. I’m not sure. I think I’ll put that off for another month or ten. I just feel kind of empty right now, like I don’t have the motivation for anything new. I need to float in a sensory deprivation pool. I’m kind of hurting but not sure why. Weird.

Wednesday, April 22

Back on the wagon again

4:19 pm

I’m mentally unwinding from eight back to back Zoom lessons. The last boy, a fifth grade trumpet, is REALLY bad. Painfully bad. Plus the audio / video delay and distortion make it even worse to bear. It’s been raining and gloomy all day and it just started pelting down on the roof again. The weather in Lewistown looked warm and sunny today in the videos my daughter from Lewistown sent me of her and the boys out walking and playing in the yard.

Today is my first day back on keto and intermittent fasting. When I was so badly sick with what I thought was flu in mid January into February I lost a bunch of weight and didn’t feel like eating. But once I came out of that I’ve been eating poorly and my gut doesn’t feel right. Ugh! It’s hell to get old. 

At the Wynn a few years back.

I didn’t mean to sound like a bitch earlier. Most of my students are very good. I’m just frazzled right now. This too shall pass. I had some celery with cream cheese, some spinach and black coffee today. I have my “ big meal” with a few carbs and be finished eating by 6pm. The I’ll fast until 10 am tomorrow. After a few days it’s not so bad. I’m only on my one a day thyroid pill. No other medicines. No blood pressure, blood sugar, cholesterol medicines at all. I don’t want to screw that up by eating poorly and packing on the pounds. I have had enough drugs ( chemo) to last a life time. I very seldom ever drink alcohol at all - maybe 2 beers in a year. Life has been exciting enough.

I try not to even think of politics anymore. It’s too upset. I seriously won’t be able to bear it or function if Trump gets re-elected. I will totally lose my shit and go postal. If you know me you know it’s very likely. Is Biden going to be tough enough to swing this? Or is Russian and the toxic Trump cult going to bring him down?  

Arlo is going to be 3 next week. How did he get that big? I miss those kids SO much. I can’t wait for this bullshit to be over so I can hug my grandkids!

I have a Parmesan crusted fish Lean Cuisine in the microwave. yum.

Our last staff day of this suck-y school year is May 28. A year to remember in your nightmares. Almost over. This ain’t my first rodeo. Just keep swimming. 

We’re doing the best we can with the circumstances. We keep getting up in the morning. We keep breathing in and out. We keep telling ourselves things will work out. Everything will be alright. We keep seeing the suffering and watching people die. We try to move on carrying all the pain, hurt, loss, disappointment, failure, loss betrayal. We keep patching bandages on our torn bleeding aching souls. We just keep trudging through the ever deeper snow with miles to go before we sleep. 

Friday, March 6

Laugh a lot

6:26 am

Sipping my second cup of coffee with milk and cinnamon looking out the front window at the hazy gloomy sky. At least it’s Friday. At least it’s Friday. 

4:08. Due to my weak immune system and the fact I catch colds and flus and everything frequently I’m more than a little nervous of the spread of the corona virus. I’ve been trying to be extra careful and washing my hands thoroughly several times a day at school. SO many germs are at schools.

We’re going to the Huntley legion fish fry later and then coming home to watch Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO. We are not partners, drinkers or night owls at all. I almost never have an alcoholic drink and Michael less than me. Life is exciting enough. I’m six try now and trying to stay as healthy as possible and take care of myself inside and outside. Great anti-aging creams.  best foundation Best primer product

Tuesday, February 4

It just figures

I was pretty pumped up about the Iowa democratic caucus and had been looking forward to it all week. Then last night while watching it I felt frustrated by the whole complicated clusterf*ck process and lack of any real results. I wish they’d just do away with it. Tonight is Trump’s #nevertrump, #makeamericasmartagain, state of the union address. I don’t know if I can stand to watch him. He makes me sick. 

I called TRS three times yesterday about getting my retirement packet and got three different people all with different information and issues. So that’s a clusterf*ck too. I just want to fill out my paperwork, get my ducks in a row, retire and get my pension and find some other form of supplemental income. I am trying really hard to stay engaged and keep a good attitude about my job but honestly I’ve pretty much already mentally checked out.

I need to go to the grocery store. Since I had the flu three weeks ago I’ve felt exhausted and haven’t felt like doing much at all. Mike has gone to the store a couple times but doesn’t really shop with cooking meals in mind. He’ll get himself hot dogs and sport peppers. So I need to go. I’m still coughing and tired. I always feel so blah this time of year with all the sickness and endless days of overcast skies. Yuck. I’m dreaming of a cruise to some tropical destination! 
swim wear

Saturday, January 25

I will survive

Good morning. It’s 8:06 Saturday and I just woke up a while ago and am drinking my first coffee since last Saturday. I’ve been so sick all week I could barely eat or drink anything. I am sipping today’s coffee slowly. My gut has been very unhappy. I did manage to get up and take a shower, wash my hair, style it and put some lotion on my face and put on real clothes yesterday so I didn’t feel like such a troll. I  spent the week in pajamas or lounge pants, my hair up in a haggard bun and no makeup or moisturizer. I got pretty dehydrated and was startled Thursday when I was sitting at my bathroom vanity mirror and noticed how drawn and wrinkled and haggard I looked. My arms and hands were all dry and scaled and shriveled looking. I couldn’t sleep for about three days or keep my food or drink in that didn’t go straight through me. No wonder I’ve been so weak and unstable on my feet. Mike stayed home with me several days. So I’m feeling better but not 100%. I plan to go back to work Monday but take it easy. We shall see how it goes.

The situation with my oldest daughter is still going on. She is not responding to calls or texts-to me, her father, her siblings. She has only stated she’s fine and is de stressing and doesn’t want to talk. This has been going on for weeks. She’s thirty-seven so I just have to trust she’ll work out whatever it is. I can’t help but worry. I try to remind myself to have faith.

Thursday Mike and I were supposed to attend my first retirement meeting for this year’s retirees. Of course I was too sick to go so now I’ll have to try to play catch up and get the information I missed. Another hassle to chase down when I’m feeling exhausted. HR sent me a link about the insurance and TRS stuff- too much overwhelming information. Oh well it will all work out. Things always work out. 

In an attempt to build back some strength I’m going to try to move around more today, perhaps go outside and shovel a bit and get some fresh air. We’re supposed to get up to 7” and it’s still snowing. Mike did it by himself yesterday before he left for work. He has two bum shoulders that are going to need fixed before too much longer. Like everything else he keeps putting it off. He just wants to take care of me.

The ongoing political situation is nauseating, mind numbing, frightening and fascinating all at once. I watched quite a bit of the impeachment hearings this week. Adan Schiff was awesome, passionate and well spoken. We all know, unfortunately, that it will do no good and the Republicans have the Senate majority and will vote to keep Trump in office. It is unfathomable that we have a US president so similar to Hitler. His followers are a cult. How did this happen to the USA?  I have very little hope that the fall presidential election won’t be screwed by the Russians again. I read the Chicago Daily Herald, top stories from the Washington Post, New York Times, Huffington Post nearly  every day. I watch Anderson Cooper 360 on CNN, Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO and Fox News ( for conservative balance to be fair) but I still don’t have much clarity or faith in the state of our country.

11:35. I’ve been doing a little light housework and finally got around to watering my plants. A couple have not survived the winter. That’s the way it always goes. You can’t please everyone. The dead plants go out to the back side area of the house that I’ve designated the dump. Their pots and dirt will be used for other things next spring. It’s snowing pretty hard again. The snowflakes are big and fluffy coming down fast. To me this is the part of winter that’s a bucket of suck. The first part is okay but then about mid-January it starts to suck. I can seriously see us in a few years being January to March snow birds.

Testing testing testing

I’m trying to figure out how to work this Amazon Affiliate business in a way that I can easily manage.  Discount birdbath!  I hope I’m doing...